Dentist

Just came back from getting my teeth cleaned. And I heard a lady down the hall remarking how she loves how her mouth feels after a cleaning - she would skip lunch so she could go around all day with her extra clean mouth. Wrong answer. What's good about an extra clean mouth is going right out for a chocolate eclair. They taste just that much better with shiny clean teeth. (that's probably why God lets us live so long: so we have time to learn these things)

Hey, know what's fun to do when you first go to a new dentist? When they give you the free toothbrush and the little tube of toothpaste at the end of the appointment, pretend like you have no idea what a toothbrush is. "You do what with it?" Sometimes they realize you're kidding.