Saturday, October 31, 2009


No, not my costume. But we did have spam last night; in anticipation of the hard times a-commin'. Course, we've already established that Spam isn't a particularly inexpensive meat. But scientific (!) studies have shown that, in hard times, people like to increase their intake of sodium and preservatives. Well, I do anyway. I like salt.

Anyway, it was a fine meal. Only hitch was some poor timing on my part concerning when the noodles would be done; but I covered up my mistake by claiming the spam "needed to rest" for five minutes after frying.

Darn you Obama. You've only been in office for 9 months and already we're reduced to eating Spam. (mmmmmm.....)

Happy Halloween

Have a safe and bomb-free Halloween.
(image via Gates of Vienna)

Sea Level

Science is just a vehicle for supporting what you want to believe these days. Latest:

PHILADELPHIA –- An international team of environmental scientists led by the University of Pennsylvania has shown that sea-level rise, at least in North Carolina, is accelerating. Researchers found 20th-century sea-level rise to be three times higher than the rate of sea-level rise during the last 500 years. In addition, this jump appears to occur between 1879 and 1915, a time of industrial change that may provide a direct link to human-induced climate change.

Hey scientists, stay focused. Sea level change is the dire consequence. Carbon dioxide is the poisonous raiser of temperature. If you want to say that carbon dioxide raised the temperature, then argue that. Support that argument. But you can't say, dire consequences happened, therefore the temperature must have gone up, therefore carbon dioxide must have done it.

And while we're on the subject, aren't we floating on a continental plate? Do we know everything about the dynamics of this big raft we're on? And are you sure the sea level rose? Couldn't it have been North Carolina going down a few centimeters?

Regardless, the article's lame AGW boostery is very much like the drink-killed-uncle-Charley argument: Uncle Charley started drinking again. Uncle Charley died. Therefore, drink killed uncle Charley. (even though he was run over by a bread truck on his way to work)

Friday, October 30, 2009

Obamacare in your future

h/t: nimos

Who Knew There Was Such a Thing?

Times Online:

Switzerland announced plans yesterday to crack down on “suicide tourism”....

I don't know dear, where do you want to go this year?

2009 Halloween Class Video

pretty funny

Bonus: an explanation of Obamamath -- 1=2

Pretty Cool

Eyeball fun. Stare at the dot for a pretty cool optical illusion. You have to go to the link for it to work. The above image is just a screen grab; you can stare at it all day and nothing will happen. Well not nothing, your eyes will eventually dry out, and probably the office manager will come up behind you and ask you what the hell you're doing and why isn't that TPS report done yet.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Great Image

One of those wished-I'd-thought-of-that photoshops.

Grouchy Old Cripple
thanks Baron

Also, by way of Dymphna:

What is the difference between Bird Flu and Swine Flu?

For bird flu you need tweetment and for swine flu you need oinkment.


BTW- I got both flu shots. For the record, I still suspect H1N1 is being overhyped, but I was going to be hounded until I got the vaccine, so I got it.

Dr. Who



Bear Picasso Costume Zoom

found various places

Haloween Story

A man is walking home alone late one foggy night…

when behind him he hears:




Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.




Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him






He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.

However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping




on his heels, the terrified man runs.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.

Bumping and clapping toward him.

The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!

Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket…


The coffin stops


Wednesday, October 28, 2009

While Searching for Harry Reid Prayer Photos..

Oh man, what a picture. No, it's not just the fact that Paul Simon has aged. All the musical heroes of my youth look like old lesbians these days; and really, standing next to Nancy Pelosi probably makes anyone look younger. But why do you have to associate with the nightmare people, Paul?

I get that he now has lots on money and wants to do good. And I think that's great. Go out and do good Al, (he told me I could call him that) just don't support the people who want to use my money to do themselves good.

Aside- I was tickled way back when Paul Simon was doing his collaborating with African musicians: I think he was touring with Ladysmith Black Mambazo and the local NPR station did an interview with him. The interview went fine until they opened it up to questions from the audience. Every single comment or question had to do with him exploiting the black man and getting rich off of African talent. Best part - nobody would let him get a single word in edgewise. I thought to myself, "See? That's the kind of idiot I used to be, and Paul used to be too, most likely."

I don't know if he was similarly humbled, but if they had let him talk, I'm pretty sure he would have told them that most of his share of the income was going to anti-apartheid organizations. That was some of his best music too.

Too Amused


Most Powerful Writer

Rocco Landesman, Obama's hand picked chairman of the NEA said something silly:

"...Barack Obama is the most powerful writer since Julius Caesar."

Um, Rocco, if that is your name, aren't you forgetting something?:

If I were you, I'd be anticipating a round-house kick before long.

I was also going to mention something about the good judgment of the NEA by noting that they paid $15,000.00 for a picture of a crucifix submerged in a glass of urine, but I googled it for the date (1987) and found something else:
PILING, MA - Pro ObamaCare artists have filled an old quarry with thousands of gallons of urine in an NEA-funded exhibit called 'Urine Lake.' "These are my peeps," said Deputy Director Buffy Wicks of the White House Office of Public Engagement. Working with artists around the country in conjunction with the National Endowment of the Arts, Wicks hopes to energize the public in support of the President's health care initiative. "We wanted to make a bold statement right out of the gate," said Wicks about Urine Lake. "And while I can't tell you what it means exactly, it symbolizes healthcare change."

I should note that the piece is satire, but just barely.

Weresheep Run Amok

Here's a so bad it's good, over the top, scary/funny movie for those of you who don't have a Halloween movie yet. Here's the test: if you can see the humor in fighting off a rabid sheep with a broken bottle of mint sauce, you'll like the movie.

h/t: bro

Monday, October 26, 2009


From Newsbusters:

Give Ed Schultz credit for something: on his MSNBC show this evening, he hosted an amusing smackdown between Barney Frank and Ralph Nader, perhaps the two most morose public men in America. For once, Barney was attacked from the left. The gist of Ralph's rebuke was that Frank hasn't gone far enough in regulating the financial industry.

Frank was finally so provoked that he claimed/admitted that when it comes to regulation, Democrats are "trying on every front to increase the role of government."...

PS: don't miss the video of Barney blasting Nader with this choice insult: "Ralph gets to luxuriate in the purity of his irrelevance." Ouch.

How odd to see the word "smackdown" used regarding these two. Really, they're like the antonym of "smackdown". I say put them in the ring with Alan Alda as ref. Oh, wrists would be sprained, yes they would.

It still amazes me though that even with video of Congressman Frank fighting GSE regulation, he still manages to escape any blame for the Freddie and Fannie meltdown. Ah, well.

Two Chuckles and a Ha


Bullet, Dodged

CBS- Got Perfect Credit? You Could Be Charged For It!

Loraine Mullen-Kress carries a Bank of America credit card and religiously pays off her balance.

"Flawless credit," she boasted.

Yet now, her good credit habits could cost her. Earlier this month Bank of America started notifying customers like Mullen-Kress that they will be charged a new annual fee of $29 to $99.

Luckily for me, my wife saw this coming years ago and adjusted our credit score downward. Thanks honey.

Go Calvin, Go Calvin, Go Calvin

Obviously the AP doesn't realize it's publishing this stuff:

WASHINGTON – In the health care debate, Democrats and their allies have gone after insurance companies as rapacious profiteers making "immoral" and "obscene" returns while "the bodies pile up."

But in pillorying insurers over profits, the critics are on shaky ground. Ledgers tell a different reality.

Health insurance profit margins typically run about 6 percent, give or take a point or two. That's anemic compared with other forms of insurance and a broad array of industries, even some beleaguered ones.

Profits barely exceeded 2 percent of revenues in the latest annual measure. This partly explains why the credit ratings of some of the largest insurers were downgraded to negative from stable heading into this year, as investors were warned of a stagnant if not shrinking market for private plans.

Insurers are an expedient target for leaders who want a government-run plan in the marketplace....

And now in some dark Washington DC warehouse they're removing the tarp from the Clinton's "old faithful" heart attack machine. Now they're oiling it's rollers. Hide Calvin Woodward, hide.

Now at midnight all the agents
And the superhuman crew
Come out and round up everyone
That knows more than they do
Then they bring them to the factory
Where the heart-attack machine
Is strapped across their shoulders
And then the kerosene
Is brought down from the castles
By insurance men who go
Check to see that nobody is escaping
To Desolation Row

Vampire Check

This isn't new but it's a good one, and I'm almost sure I didn't post it here yet:

reprized by

Taxpayer Alert


It's for the Show

It was inevitable: the Balloon Boy Halloween costume.


Headline Only

Human Evolution: Are Humans Still Evolving?

Short answer: no.

Long answer: Noooooooooo!

This Will Anger the Mopper

This just in, the White House no longer considers CBS a "news" outlet:

STEVE KROFT, CBS: Of all the problems facing the United States right now, none are more important than healthcare. President Obama says rising costs are driving huge federal budget deficits that imperil our future, and that there is enough waste and fraud in the system to pay for health care reform if it was eliminated.

At the center of both issues is Medicare, the government insurance program that provides health care to 46 million elderly and disabled Americans. But it also provides a rich and steady income stream for criminals who are constantly finding new ways to steal a sizable chunk of the half a trillion dollars that are paid out each year in Medicare benefits.

In fact, Medicare fraud - estimated now to total about $60 billion a year - has become one of, if not the most profitable crimes in America.

We caution you that this story may raise your blood pressure, along with some troubling questions about our government's ability to manage a medical bureaucracy.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Sad Day in Minnesota

Seems as if the armchair DUI guy plead guilty:

DULUTH, Minn. – A Minnesota man has pleaded guilty to driving his motorized La-Z-Boy chair while drunk. A criminal complaint says 62-year-old Dennis LeRoy Anderson told police he left a bar in the northern Minnesota town of Proctor on his chair after drinking eight or nine beers.

So, apparently in Minnesota pleading awesome isn't an option.


From the AP:

WASHINGTON – Quick quiz: What do these enterprises have in common? Farm and construction machinery, Tupperware, the railroads, Hershey sweets, Yum food brands and Yahoo? Answer: They're all more profitable than the health insurance industry.

In the health care debate, Democrats and their allies have gone after insurance companies as rapacious profiteers making "immoral" and "obscene" returns while "the bodies pile up."

Ledgers tell a different reality. Health insurance profit margins typically run about 6 percent, give or take a point or two. That's anemic compared with other forms of insurance and a broad array of industries, even some beleaguered ones.

It's not amazing that health insurance companies' profits are so low. I already knew that. What's amazing is that the AP would report it. It's the same with the drug companies -- if you think they're making outrageous profits, then buy stock in them. Why not get all that outrageous profit yourself? (course, when you look into it you might find that when there's a healthy profit potential, there's also a healthy risk attached)

So go ahead, Mopper in Chief, identify the greedy scoundrels in our capitalistic system. I'll look up their stock symbols for you.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Photo Booth

Run Forrest Run

One Last Pie in the Face, Darn

Soupy Sales, sadly has passed away. You may be too young to remember, but Soupy Sales was this guy:

In what would have turned into one heck of a viral story if the Internet had been around in 1965, a disgruntled Sales ended his New Year's Day broadcast of The Soupy Sales Show by instructing his young audience to creep into their parents' bedrooms, take their parents' "funny green pieces of paper with pictures of U.S. Presidents," and mail the paper to him.

When money started arriving at the studio, Sales explained he was only joking and either returned the dough or donated the unreturnables to charity.

The man was a genius. RIP Soupy.

Obama Escalates Feud

I know Obama hates criticism, and goodness knows he isn't used to it, but hey, look at what George Bush put up with.

This latest stunt makes Obama look weak and afraid:

Just when you thought the White House couldn't possibly do anything to make their bizarre feud with the Fox News Channel an even larger spectacle - the administration manages to take it to another level...

...On the Oct. 22 broadcast of Fox News Channel's "Special Report," host Bret Baier revealed a White House pool announcement was offering Kenneth Feinberg, the "Special Master for Compensation," better known as the White House "pay czar" for interviews - all except for one network - Fox News.

Imagine for a moment that this was George Bush trying to exclude Helen Thomas. Can you even conceive such a thing? It's nuts.

But maybe the pool's reaction will be a wake-up call:
The press pool is comprised of the five major TV news organizations - CNN, ABC, NBC, CBS and Fox News. However, according to Baier, the other members declined to participate unless Fox News was included.

"When they put out that message, they specified that all members of the pool were welcome except Fox News," Baier said. "Well the other members of the TV pool said, ‘Well we're not going to do the interview unless Fox News is included."

I suppose thanks are in order. The other networks did the principled thing. Though I suspect a measure of self interest was involved: If you let the President kill a news network, how long before that power is used to dictate the conduct of all news networks? Soon, 'insufficient praise' would get you frozen out of press opportunities.

Keep it up, Mr Obama, you're looking soooo presidential.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Another Pair that Ignore My Facebook Friend Requests

Enemies List

Obvious Question

Drudge headlines:

CHENEY: Stop 'dithering' as troops face danger..



So OK, what Obama needs to find out is: Who told Cheney to say that?

And for My Next Trick...

He doesn't want to own a car company, yet he does. He doesn't want to own banks, but he will take over student loans. He'll dictate compensation where TARP funds have been accepted. He'll tell you where to set your thermostat, and which news to watch. And you believe him when he says he doesn't want to raise your taxes or have government run health care? Hahahahahahahaha.

RUI -- Reclining Under the Influence

If motorized La-Z-Boys are outlawed, only outlaws will have motorized La-Z-Boys:

A Proctor man driving a motorized La-Z-Boy lounge chair hit a parked vehicle while under the influence of alcohol.

Dennis LeRoy Anderson, 62, pleaded guilty Monday in St. Louis County District Court to DWI in connection with the Aug. 31, 2008, incident in Proctor. There were no injuries.

According to the criminal complaint, Anderson drove his motorized chair into a vehicle parked near a Proctor bar. Anderson told police he was traveling from the Keyboard Lounge after consuming approximately eight or nine beers. His blood-alcohol content was measured at 0.29, more than three times the legal limit to drive.

Anderson claimed he was driving the chair fine until a woman jumped on it and knocked the chair off course. He has one prior DWI conviction. He couldn't be reached for comment Wednesday.

How to Burn Down Mom's Garage

BTW - "Ty dach ci się pali" is Polish for "Your roof is on fire."

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Wabbit Hunting

Swedes with shovels, stoking the furnaces with fuzzy "fuel", I wish I could see it:

The bodies of thousands of rabbits culled every year from the parks in Stockholm’s Kungsholmen neighbourhood are being used to fuel a heating plant in central Sweden.

My first vision was of flaming hossenfeffers escaping into the surrounding suburbs and burning them to ash. But not to worry:
Animal control authorities employ a special rifle to shoot the excess rabbits, with most of the culling taking place at dawn when the animals peek out from their holes.

When they peek out? Poor little tame rabbits? Peta must be going nuts.

h/t: OMMAG

City Slickers

OK, so you're saying I can record something I'm not even
watching? And the TV doesn't have to be on channel 3?

Just in Time for Halloween

With fava beans and a nice Chianti.

Partisan maybe, but I don't wish anyone ill. So what a surprise when I saw one of the assistant moppers on Drudge looking like she'd blown an aneurysm. Good news though, it was just a medical procedure to remove a few lesions.
"She is back fighting to get everyone the same good health care she has," Backus said in an e-mail.

Um, thanks for the offer, Kathleen, but I'm going to have to get back to you on that.

Let me appologize in advance:



Cake, Taken

This tears it. We have officially become the laziest people on the planet. Never mind that our president has become the only man in America who knows how to mop without precipitating an industrial accident, now the rest of us are buying machines to throw balls for our dogs to fetch. How long before we've got robots to tickle our children, or go to the beach for us?

Sheesh, people. Learn this, remember this: You don't buy a machine to throw balls for your dog to fetch. You hire a neighbor kid to do it.

Puppy Being a Puppy

Warning: watching in full-screen mode has been linked to diabetic crisis.

Where Do We Mop?

"Let me rephrase that: Grab a mop and mop where I tell you to.
There's nothing over there that needs cleaning. Nothing at all."

It's cute the way he says that it's someone else's mess. As if the health care industry ran amok under Bush's watch, and isn't an evolving entity that has been steadily growing since the 1940's. If it's all W's fault, why was Hillary pushing reform before Bush was ever elected?

But cuter still is his mop metaphor. The GOP has mops Mr President, but you want nothing to do with them. You want only Democrat mops writing this bill and it's disingenuous to claim Republican "someones" are mop-shy.

***Update: What, not ridiculed the concept enough, you say? OK:

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Carving Out Favors

One big reason to oppose the latest health care bill:

Oct. 20 (Bloomberg) -- Nevada would get help with its Medicaid bills. The elderly in Florida and New York would receive additional Medicare benefits. And workers in so-called high-risk professions such as firefighting and construction would get a break on a new insurance tax.

Those are provisions that Senate Democrats, including Majority Leader Harry Reid, put in an $829 billion health-care bill to shield constituents from measures intended to pay for the biggest overhaul of the medical system in four decades.

The result is the new policies may be unevenly administered, with some U.S. states getting preferential treatment, a possibility that has given Republican lawmakers ammunition to attack the legislation.

“It’s going to hurt the bill and raise the level of cynicism about Washington politics,” said Senator Lamar Alexander, a Tennessee Republican. “The provisions ought to be applied to all of the states.”

What do you think about paying taxes for health care that don't apply to folks in Nevada? Shouldn't federal taxes apply equally to everyone?

But what I'd really like to see is equality among patients. Shouldn't Harry Reid be part of the system he mandates for the rest of us? Shouldn't he have to join the waiting lists, and be limited to government approved drugs?

What? There won't be waiting lists? No drugs being denied because they're too expensive for the program? Good, then Harry, Nancy, Barbra, and Barrack shouldn't mind being a part of it.



Thanks a Lot Balloon Boy

"Mom, look! It's got me. Mom, I'm
floating away, mom! Save me, Mom!!"

Monday, October 19, 2009

Old Nude Communists

There's a nudist colony for communists. Two old men are sitting on the front porch. One turns to the other and says, "I say, old boy, have you read Marx?"

And the other says, "Yes ... I believe it's these wicker chairs."


Funny Cuz It's True

you know, or not true...


String Theory

A piece of string goes into a bar and orders a drink.

"I'm sorry," says the barman "we don't serve string in here."

The piece of string goes outside, ruffles up his hair and goes back in. Again he orders a drink.

"Are you that piece of string that was in here a moment ago?" asks the barman.

"No," he replies "I'm a frayed knot".

What Are You Going to Be?

Creative way to freak out your neighbors.

The Future

The National Library of France (BnF) has an amazing collection of prints from 1910 which depict life in the year 2000. They are credited to Villemard. See more of them here.

I don't see jetpacks. They were more of a sixties' prediction. Which, scientists, if you're listening, I'm still waiting for.

Just Noticed

U.S. President Barack Obama greets third and fourth grade students at
Viers Mill Elementary School in Silver Spring, Maryland, October 19, 2009.

And nobody is upset. So maybe it was about the "recommended" lesson plan and content of the attempted broadcast into all schools.


Germans trying to pronounce Massachusetts. Funny, though the same could have been done with Americans pronouncing Mönchengladbach.

Japanese Game Shows

I used to think it'd be fun to learn Japanese just so I could follow their wacky game shows, but lately I'm thinking it's better not to know what's really going on.

That Was Fast

Good timing, a game for balloon boy's dad to play in the holding cell, while wondering what kind of prison he's going to be sent to.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Ever Dream this Man?

In January 2006 in New York, the patient of a well-known psychiatrist draws the face of a man that has been repeatedly appearing in her dreams. In more than one occasion that man has given her advice on her private life. The woman swears she has never met the man in her life.

That portrait lies forgotten on the psychiatrist's desk for a few days until one day another patient recognizes that face and says that the man has often visited him in his dreams. He also claims he has never seen that man in his waking life.

The psychiatrist decides to send the portrait to some of his colleagues that have patients with recurrent dreams. Within a few months, four patients recognize the man as a frequent presence in their own dreams. All the patients refer to him as THIS MAN.

From January 2006 until today, at least 2000 people have claimed they have seen this man in their dreams, in many cities all over the world: Los Angeles, Berlin, Sao Paulo, Tehran, Beijing, Rome, Barcelona, Stockholm, Paris, New Dehli, Moskow etc.

OK, not to throw cold water on it or anything, but this has to be another viral marketing campaign. That face is generic enough, but something about it grabs your attention. It's not "do I know this guy?" it's "hey those eyes are too big for that head," or maybe "you could land a plane on the space between his upper lip and his nose." That's what grabs your attention.

Anyway, the face is obviously taken from an image we've all seen. Here's a hint:

Not getting it? OK how bout this:

Another good guess, Wallace Shawn, as in: you keep saying that word, I don't think it means what you think it means...

Friday, October 16, 2009

Uncommon Knowledge

David Brady and Daniel Kessler discuss the enigma that is our chief executive. This one, part 5, was my favorite segment, but the whole series was good. Sorry for the light blogging but I'm still pretty busy.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Sanctions for Iran

Just a reminder for anyone who might be tempted to buy Russia's contention that sanctions won't work: In January Russia cut off all gas to Europe, in the middle of winter, solely for economic advantage:

MOSCOW -- Russia cut off all gas supplies to Europe through Ukraine on Wednesday, playing hardball in a weeklong standoff that has left more than a dozen countries struggling to cope with dwindling energy supplies in the depths of winter.

Al Gore on Global Warming

Darn, I'm on the Blog Action Day mailing list but I'm too busy to write much today. So I'll just put up a video, and a link.

What a day for a bunch of Urban Mythists to be blogging about climate change. It's freezing here, and the lumber wife and kid are visiting colleges in Pennsylvania - at risk of being snowed in on October 15th.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

No Comment Needed


Foreign Policy

Did Noble laureate Barack Obama think the Russians can't get CNN?

He caved on missile defense so that the Russians would help us put pressure on Iran. But they won't help us, and they say that sanctions won't work. Gee, who could have predicted that?

Course, the cave on missile defense made NLBO look weak so he announced that the scrapped missile defense didn't matter because we would go with a mobile missile defense system; which was a better solution anyway.

But whoops! The Russians heard that too:

MOSCOW (AP) - A top Russian security official says Moscow reserves the right to conduct pre-emptive nuclear strikes to safeguard the country against aggression on both a large and a local scale, according to a newspaper interview published Wednesday.

No, I don't think we're any closer to seeing a nuclear conflict than we were a week ago but the Russians are talking this way for a reason. NLBO is giving ground everywhere. He's being the world-view guy, the world-uniter guy, the Age of Aquarius new day savior guy that he promised he would be. And he backs down so easily, why shouldn't the Russians push? It's also a reminder to Ukraine and the other FSUs that Russia is still the big dog on the block. Anyone think this administration will confront Russia over aggression towards its neighbors?

Putin is showing the world how easily the US president is pushed around. NLBO is hoping that Putin will become a world-view-uniter guy, like himself. I'm hoping NLBO will start looking out for the interests of his own country, like Putin.

***Update:Michael Rubin gets it:
It is now time for Obama strategists to understand that their strategy isn't working and reset. They should have learned several lessons.

(1) Unilateral concessions do no beget unilateral concessions and advance diplomacy. Rather, they signal weakness and forfeit leverage.

(2) Multilateralism can bestow greater international legitimacy upon actions, but it is not a panacea. Rather, accomodating recalcitrant regimes with opposite interests often waters down policy to the point of ineffectiveness. Sometimes unilateralism — or, dare I say it, "Coalitions of the Willing," work.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Cliff Notes on a Nobel Laureate

h/t: TWS

A Problem With My Order

From Miss Cellania:
A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the 'Chicken Surprise'.

The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot. Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down.

'Good grief, did you see that?' she asks her husband. He hasn't, so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two little eyes looking around before it slams down.

Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening, and demands an explanation.

'Please sir,' says the waiter, 'what you order?'

The husband replies, 'Chicken Surprise.'

'Ah! So sorry,' says the waiter, 'I bring you Peeking Duck'.