Friday, February 16, 2007

Food Police


Tales of the Food Police:

Today Marks & Spencer, one of Britain's largest grocery store chains, announced its plan to hire 1,500 food police to patrol supermarket aisles and lecture shoppers on the contents of their carts. Reminiscent of grade-school Hall Pass Monitors, these health food patrols will donofficial Healthy Eating Adviser badges while harassing customers about the fat, sugar, and salt levels of their purchases.
Can this be real? I can't even imagine being even a little interested in what somebody else eats. Well, beyond, "So how is your steak?" conversation at dinner. And I'm not really interested in how your steak is, I'm just making distracting conversation in order to cage the last sourdough roll.

I'll tell you what, some smiling food police ever dares to criticize my delicately balanced diet of chocolate, salt, grease, ice cream, and more salt, and he'll end up face down in aisle six with a pineapple enema.

2 comments:

Stone said...

From my point of view, a less freedom-restricting action would be to lay some silly string on the offenders. And if I ever hear these morons have infested my zip code, I'll be wearing two cans - one on each hip and Hangin' Low...

PGP said...

Apparently....you haven't yet figured out the depth of the nurse-nanny mentality in British society.

let the football hooligans deal with the meddling asshats!

fighting101s.jpg