Sunday, September 30, 2012

Rapido y Furioso

"Rapido y Furioso," it's more than just a description of Oprah and Michelle Obama when the waiter arrives with the mashed potatoes. It seems that Univision is going to do the job that the American media has been avoiding: investigating Fast and Furious, one of the most shameful US government programs ever.

From day one I have been trying to find a non-horrible explanation for the ATF actually facilitating the "walking" of powerful weapons across the border into Mexico. Note, these weren't weapons they tried to track but failed to keep track of. These were weapons they didn't try to track.

The ATF expected to catch up with them when the Mexican police recovered some of them from the drug cartels, but they seem to have had little interest in the damage done in between. Why? Could it be that Mexican lives aren't valuable when compared to good that could come from this program? And what good could come from it? What good at all except that it would bolster the Administration argument for more gun control on our side of the border.

Can you imagine Obama pointing to Mexican tragedies, tragedies that his ATF helped create and saying that these precious lives demand our protection. These precious lives, that we hoped would become our ammunition for stricter gun laws, these lives that weren't important to us when we calculated the risk vs reward of Fast and Furious, these lives are now important enough to protect.

I'm sorry. Give me any other explanation that makes sense.

I can't imagine Obama getting a single Mexican American vote. Not one.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Joe Goes on a Trip

Joe is excited that the President is sending him on vacation. His spirits aren't 
even dampened by the lack of flight attendants, other passengers, or landing gear.

Friday, September 28, 2012

If Mitt Romney is Mr Richy Richrich

Why then is President Obama the one throwing hundred dollar bills off the back of his yacht?

I'm Glad

I'm glad I'm not the only one who does this.

found on the internet

Sad Beyond Words

Get Your Obamaphone!

Wow, who would have thought the "Obamaphone" was real? A Drudge story referenced the site claiming credit for Obama so it's unreachable at the moment due to heavy demand.

Google still has the cache though and I got a screen shot. If you do a whois search you find that the site has been around for a year, and was registered through Domains by Proxy.

So the proceeds from a tax on our phones is being claimed as a gift from Obama. Amazing.

***Update: In the time it took me to post this, the site has changed:

Yeah, we need 4 more years of this sort of corruption.

Please note: the registrant of the domain name is specified
in the "registrant" field. In most cases,, LLC
is not the registrant of domain names listed in this database.

Registered through:, LLC (
Created on: 26-Aug-11
Expires on: 26-Aug-13
Last Updated on: 13-Jul-12

Domains By Proxy, LLC
14747 N Northsight Blvd Suite 111, PMB 309
Scottsdale, Arizona 85260
United States

Administrative Contact:
Private, Registration
Domains By Proxy, LLC
14747 N Northsight Blvd Suite 111, PMB 309
Scottsdale, Arizona 85260
United States
(480) 624-2599 Fax -- (480) 624-2598

Technical Contact:
Private, Registration
Domains By Proxy, LLC
14747 N Northsight Blvd Suite 111, PMB 309
Scottsdale, Arizona 85260
United States
(480) 624-2599 Fax -- (480) 624-2598

Domain servers in listed order:

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Economic Destruction, So Easy, Even a Caveman Could Do It

The lumberwife said she was seeing images of Obama as a caveman on TV and I realized what a good idea that was... So, I did mine before I saw the one she was talking about. (on the assumption that it would be so good that it would discourage me from even trying) So, well, here.

And this one was an internet found haha:

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Why Can't We All Just Sit Down and Talk

So I see the US will (rightly) boycott Ahmadinejad's speech at the UN. Didn't a boycotted UN speech prompt Obama's "we shouldn't be afraid to talk to our adversaries" spiel in the 2008 campaign? Remember that? Bush was a stern-faced ideologue and the Middle East would burn unless we had a drastic foreign policy change.

Well we had a drastic change. How's that working out? Maybe we need to apologize harder.

The Cute

Sorry for the light posting. I've been busy bidding on work. Hey, here's a thought: being unemployed is the default state when you work for yourself. It takes constant work to keep your status "other than".

So, as is my MO, I revert to cute files. Enjoy the fuzzies:

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Lumberjack Day

Some are saying that Sept 26th is Lumberjack Day. I think we know that every day is Lumberjack Day.

Sure, some will pretend to be a lumberjack for a day, possibly even dress in women's clothing and hang around in bars, and they'll have no idea how hard it is to pretend to be a lumberjack 24/7-365. Well, rest assured, I'll still be out there in the pretend forest long after they've moved on to talk like a pirate day.

Someone has got to pretend to get the wood, eh?

Monday, September 24, 2012

Do High Taxes Raise More Money?

This stuff doesn't have to be partisan. JFK understood the Laffer curve. Now you do too.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Paul Ryan Booed

Sheesh, seniors that think they'll be better off with Obamacare? Do they know that Medicare Advantage was patched so as to continue past the election? Do they know that next year it starts going away?

Do they know Obama cuts $716 Billion from Medicare? Democrats were saying that Ryan's plan also cut $716 Billion from Medicare. No! His proposed budget included $716 Billion in cuts because budgets must be written in accordance with existing law and the law, Obama's law, cuts $716 Billion from Medicare.

AARP, the company, likes Obamacare because they market insurance, including supplemental insurance. AARP, the membership, likes Obamacare because they're easily fooled.

chart via the Corner

No More Golf Jokes Please

We've all been asked to knock it off with the Obama golf jokes. Fair enough. I suppose golf is one of the few things the President does well. We should let him have his small victories. But golf jokes are so funny. So here's a few that aren't about the prez:

A man staggers into an emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.

"Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, Michelle,when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a pasture of cows. We went to look for them, and while I was rooting around, noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it, "M O" -- stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt." "That's when I made my big mistake." "What did you do?" asks the doctor.

"Well, I lifted the cow's tail again and yelled to Michelle, "Hey, this looks like yours!" "I don't remember much after that!"

Three golfing buddies died in an auto accident and went to heaven. Upon arrival, they noticed the most beautiful golf course they have ever seen. St. Peter told them they were welcome to play the course, but he cautioned them with one rule: “Don’t step on the ducks.”

The men had blank expressions on their faces, and finally one of them said, “The ducks?” “Yes,” St. Peter Said. “There are millions of ducks walking around the golf course, and when one of them is stepped on, he squawks, and then the one next to him squawks, and soon they’re all raising hell and it really breaks the tranquility. If you step on the ducks, you’ll be punished.”

The men start playing the course, and within 15 minutes, one of the guys stepped on a duck. The duck squawked, and soon there was a deafening roar of ducks quacking. St. Peter appeared with an extremely homely woman and asked, “Who stepped on a duck?” “I did,” admitted one of the men. St. Peter immediately pulled out a pair of handcuffs and cuffed the man to the homely woman. “I told you not to step on the ducks,” he said. “Now you’ll be handcuffed together for eternity.”

The two other men were very cautious not to step on any ducks, but a couple of weeks later, one of them accidentally did. The quacks were as deafening as before, and within minutes, St. Peter walked up with a woman who was even uglier than the other one. He determined who stepped on the duck by seeing the fear in the man’s face, and he cuffed him to the woman. “I told you not to step on the ducks,” St. Peter said. “Now you’ll be handcuffed together for eternity.”

The third man, we'll call him Barack, was extremely careful. Some days he wouldn’t even move for fear of nudging a duck. After three months of this, he still hadn’t stepped on a duck. St. Peter walked up to the man and had with him the most beautiful woman the man had ever seen. St. Peter smiled and without a word, handcuffed him to the beautiful woman and walked off.

Barack, knowing that he would be handcuffed to this woman for eternity, let out a sigh and said, “What have I done to deserve this?” The woman replied: “I don’t know about you, but I stepped on a duck.”

An avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in nine holes before he had to get back for a cabinet meeting. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was golfing alone. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him.

To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn't hit the ball far, but plodded along consistently and didn't waste much time. Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the younger man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball - and directly between his ball and the green.

After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot the old man finally said, "You know, Barack, when I was your age I'd hit the ball right over that tree."

With that challenge placed before him, the man swung hard, hit the ball up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it thudded back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay.

The old man offered one more comment, "Of course, when I was your age that pine tree was only three feet tall."

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Surely This One Has Already Been Done, but..

The Idea is to write why you're voting for the destruction of the United States on your hands.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

The First Hipster

I guess it's not news that four out of five lumberjack blogs will be supporting the republican candidate come November. I haven't made a decision yet on who to endorse. But I will say this: I'm not going to be swayed by ironic socks.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

It's How I Roll

So, it happens when you work with fiddly bolts and diodes and springs and radishes -- every once in a blue moon you drop something. Well, daily, ok hourly. Alright, most days I drop more parts than I put on. Anyway, today, just as I was finishing a big job, I dropped a screw.

Now a government worker would have just called it a donation to gravity and moved on. OK, just kidding, I know most government workers would have blamed it on someone else and referred the matter to their shop steward. But I'm a contractor and I look bad if my repairs don't hold up, so I got down on one knee and scanned the floor for the runaway screw. I never get down on two knees or squat anymore because the cracking and creaking is deafening.

And there I am, down on one knee and bent forward when my government coworkers round the corner. And I don't know why but it just occurred to me to bring one arm up to my forehead and complete the Tebow. It was a big hit with the government guys. (who were between their pre-break and regular break, or possibly on their way to their after-break) I told them that I like to Tebow whenever I finish a job.

They all agreed that it was a fine tradition and promised to do the same should they ever one day (accidentally) finish a job.

Set the Way-Back Machine

Remember this cover? I was just reminded of it on The People's Cube. Remember those days, when the blindingly bright O was going to reset the Arab world? And see the flag in the fireplace, the picture of Osama on the wall, the fist bump, the headdress, and the sandals.

It's all bunk of course. Michelle's hips haven't been that narrow since she was 5 years old. The Middle East smoulders, and if we have a plan or a policy, we'll find out about it on the David Letterman Show.

Love Story

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Monday, September 17, 2012

Monday Math Lesson

probably from here

RSA Animate

I like these RSA Animates, even the ones where I've got quibbles. Best point in this one is at 1:10 -- it's not the 1% you need to worry about.

Anyway, Happy Monday.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

For what it's worth, the attack on the Libyan embassy doesn't appear to have been a grass roots action.