Thursday, January 30, 2014

Inspired by Events in Atlanta


Another post-apocalyptic drama:


via

***update:


Visitors


I don't pay much attention to visitor logs. It's nice to keep track of who's linking to the site but really, I figure some people will like me, and some people will like me, um, much less.

Every once in awhile one will jump out at me though. This one jumped out:

(covered some identifying numbers -- don't want to get anyone in trouble)

That would be the DOJ, which, hey, isn't as impressive as my one visit from the Obama white house, but still..

Maybe some DOJ staffer was looking for a legal opinion from AWL.  No, they searched an image. Hmm, let's see:


Whoops. OK guys. Well, nice knowing you. Address for the legal defense fund will follow.


Cafe Press Sale



There's a 50% off sale til midnight. I suppose it might even apply to things other than the "My work here is done" t-shirt. But why would you want anything else?


Another Problem With Cats




found

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Grandma Assassin


Grandma Assassin took no joy in her work.


SOTU



Young animals dancing together.

People [absolutely nobody] are asking for my opinion of the SOTU speech. I'd say my experience was very much like last year's, except that this year the pillow was softer.



Zomboddy puhleeease, juz shoot me.

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

The Power of Obama's Pen



Anyone who knows e-bay can tell you that a signed copy is much more valuable.

(inspiration):



Household Tip


As you probably know, every Tuesday, without fail, Are We Lumberjacks posts something and claims that it's a tradition. "Every week we post this stuff, no don't check the archives, it's true. Trust us."

But today is the exception. Why? Because we actually do publish a household hint every Tuesday. And we can't falsely claim it's a tradition if it's truly a tradition. (which I swear to you it is)

OK, so the tip:

Should your wooden furniture become damaged or worn, you should rub 
a walnut in it's face and belittle it for becoming marred so easily. This 
humiliation won't make it look any better but it might toughen it up some.


Monday, January 27, 2014

Total Ukraine Putin Does Not Swallow


 (clickabiggen)

Darn, I'm noticing that some of my favorite photoshops are ones I haven't done. No, not this one. This one is entirely real. (either that or some brave Ukrainian photoshopped it)

I like the resolve I see in the Ukraine, though I wish resolve wasn't being required of them. Gist of the article this came with: Putin gets what he wants from lightweights like Obama, because he's tough and knows what he wants. But even though it's over-matched, Ukraine isn't so easy a nut to crack.

Google Holodomor. The Ukrainians aren't going to fold up like a cheap suit.


Dog Whistle Weather


It never ends:

They're baaack!
Another cold weather system has ushered in below-zero temperatures and dangerous wind chills, three weeks after the frigid weather phenomenon broke Chicago's record low, for that time period, of -16 degrees.
Temperatures won't be quite as low this time around, but they could come close.
Of course, "Chicago" is what rethuglicans say when they can't use the N -word. Such a scandal. Be warned rethuglicans: Chris Mathews is on to your code word dog whistle shenanigans. As soon as he figures out your secret word for the war on women he's going to blow the lid off.

Friday, January 24, 2014

Amateur Lawyers


This is why you shouldn't act as your own attorney:

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla., Jan. 23 (UPI) --
The Fort Lauderdale, Fla., trial of a man accused of mail fraud may include videotapes of sex acts between him and his wife to prove they are married, he said.

Rogerio Scotton, 43, representing himself in court after disagreeing with a succession of six defense lawyers, asked U.S. District Judge Robin Rosenblum to allow him to show what the judge described as "you and your wife engaged, I guess, in some very intimate acts" to a jury.
I can testify that this tactic will fail. I've tried it myself and they made me pay the ticket anyway.


Thursday, January 23, 2014

March for Life 2014


The 41st annual March for Life happened yesterday and, like last year, Lumberkid couldn't attend due to school. And though she's skipped school in the past, this year she's student teaching so skipping isn't an option.

 Good to see that thousands (though not the usual hundreds of thousands) braved the bitter cold this year and, hold on to your hats, the Washington Post actually showed more marcher photos than anti-marcher photos. They had admitted bias (h/t: N. O'Really) last year, so maybe, just maybe, the big lumbering liberal organization can eventually be nudged into reporting what happens in the world:

[ Post Company chairman and CEO Donald Graham]said he agreed with the criticism of the paper’s abortion reporting at that time and said the Post’s job in reporting the news is “not to take sides.” However, he added, “that’s not to say we don’t make mistakes.”

Graham handed off the question to current Post publisher Katherine Weymouth, who added: “[W]e’re far from perfect — we do make mistakes.” In a private conversation with Almasi after the conclusion of the meeting, Weymouth suggested around “90 percent” of the Post newsroom holds liberal political beliefs and “obviously their bias comes through” on occasion. “We can’t be perfect,” Weymouth reiterated. Almasi pointed out that the Post’s apparent bias against large pro-life events such as the annual March for Life is a recurring problem with the paper.

“Every year, the hundreds of thousands of people who trek to Washington in January — often in snow and rain — for the March for Life get a small story in the Metro section for their efforts. And it usually includes a photo of the handful of pro-abortion counter-protesters who show up — diluting the coverage and potentially making someone not reading the article think it was a pro-abortion event. This year, the apparent bias was compounded when a gun control rally of less than 1,000 people the next day received better coverage. And another smaller rally against the Keystone XL pipeline made the front section,” said Almasi. “People consider Congress more credible than the reporters who cover them these days, and the Washington Post is seen as the poster child for bias for this kind of reporting.”
 The Post is a newspaper, and they've admitted ignoring the news, so maybe one day they'll actually rectify the situation. (The March still isn't on the web front page, except for a link to an opinion piece by Dana (if that is his name) Milbank, who wants your laws out of his womb)

Google News has this as the first image on a search for "March for Life" though:


Google's big enough to never have to change.


Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Here vs. There



Here, protestors go limp and expect to be carried onto the arrest bus. In Ukraine, the rules are different.  Success is not measured by achieving news coverage; it's measured by avoiding fire coverage.

The only advice I have for these brave Ukrainian protestors: double check your protest signs. I've never seen so many typos in my life. 


Admiration



The Drudge headline was a little misleading; it implied that Michelle Obama admired Jane Fonda. She actually said she hoped she looks as good when she's in her 70's or 80's.

But still. It's like me saying I hope my mustache looks as good as Hitler's did before his demise.




Monday, January 20, 2014

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Constitutions Matter





President Obama says he has a pen and a phone he can use to bypass Congress. Pens and phones are nice, but we have the Constitution…


Living Digitally

Even the Jetsons never envisioned:

Here are some things location trackers know about you from your phone:
- People whose cellphones move at a certain clip across city parks between 5:30 and 8:30 every morning are flagged by Viasense’s algorithm as “early morning joggers.”
- A person whose phone visits the golf course once a month is designated a casual golfer. Three times a month is classified as an intermediate golfer.
When your phone is turned on at night, companies can look at the signal and deduce that the location is your home. If the phone beams from a school, Viasense infers that the phone’s owner is a student.
- Turnstyle has placed sensors in yoga studios, a hotel, a theater, a large sports arena, coffee shops, and boutiques in downtown Toronto. The network of Wi-Fi-reading sensors enable the company to share with retailers and restaurants aggregated reports about their customers’ travels, such as the number who went to yoga last month or those who ate at a vegetarian restaurant.
- If a bulk of customers travel from a certain neighborhood, a business could target more of its advertising to this area.
Sure, some people will look at this situation and want their privacy back. But look at the opportunities  that come with having your life displayed for advertisers, bureaucrats, and government officials 24/7.  For one thing, jogging no longer requires sweat and sore knees. All you need is a friend willing to carry your phone on his/her morning run. Heck, you might even be able to get credit for a Boston marathon, or two.

Course, I say this like it would be a lark, but maybe it will become a necessity. Who thinks the government will be able to resist incorporating our descriptive metadata into its medical database? What are the chances that someday someone will be turned down for a heart transplant because he made too many trips to McDonald's over the years?

Best not chance it. Best to pay a jogger to take your phone out. Buy a vegetable juicer and make sure Amazon spells your name right. Buy your red meat with cash, and get your cigarettes from overseas.

No one ever said utopia would be easy.

Want to opt out of location tracking? Here are five things to check on your phone.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Prediction


One day our grandchildren will ask "Where did the 
phrase 'bright as a Tesla in July' come from grandpa?"


Sunday, January 12, 2014

Thursday, January 09, 2014

Government vs. Us











This Ft. Lee retaliation  kerfuffle is in the same spirit as Obama's use of the IRS to punish the Tea Party. Christie can no doubt find someone to fall on his sword, just the way Obama has people to take the blame for IRS abuses.

All politicians should be put on notice: Using the power of the state to inflict pain is unacceptable. Period.

The good news re Christie is that 2016 is a long ways away. There's a good chance the truth will come out before the next presidential election. (though, I can't be enthusiastic about anyone who could have this kind of petty vindictiveness in his office and be unaware of it)

***Update:
 As often happens, I post something, then click over to NRO and find that Victor Davis Hanson has written the same thing, word for word. (well would have been word for word if I had written it right):

What Is It about Hubris Politicians Don’t Get?
Have any of them taken two hours to read one Sophoclean play?
A reelected and proudly iconoclastic Christie in recent months relished in his swagger, braggadocio, media celebrity, and often picked fights, apparently assuming that his first-persona laced speeches and gestures were immune from the sort of nemesis that now has finally caught up with Barack Obama. His only out is the “Obama defense,” which so far has been used so successfully with the IRS and AP scandals: Outrage is voiced; promises to get to the bottom of the mess are made; aides are sent before congressional committees and occasionally sacrificed; shock is expressed at any who would dare to suggest a culture and example were set by the man at the top. And the supposedly clueless chief executive rides out the storm — until, if he continues down the path of hubris, the next attack of the goddess Nemesis strikes him. The only difference from the Obama know-nothing methodology is that the latter had access to far more government power to exempt him from scrutiny, and a far more toadish media that were invested in his mea culpas.

Tripple Dog Dare


A New Hampshire girl got stuck to a flag pole after licking it during a blizzard.

Maddie Gilmartin was left tongue tied for more than 15 minutes after performing the crazy stunt outside her East Kingston home Thursday.




The story doesn't surprise me. The family cooperating with news coverage surprises me. I'm sure a thousand kids, and drunk college students, have tried this since A Christmas Story came out. But most of them must have realized that the event was a milestone of stupid. It's not something for the resume.

h/t: wetdry

Monday, January 06, 2014

On Closer Inspection


And it immediately became clear why he'd been avoiding magnifying glasses.


Sunday, January 05, 2014

I Changed it a Little



This fine ornament painting isn't mine. The flames are mine.


Saturday, January 04, 2014

Instant Internet Star


Probably, she never much thought about the age of the earth before:




but people who had thought about it noticed:



aaaand, lesson learned:




fighting101s.jpg