Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Where the Money Goes





I received this in an e-mail. It's not a black/white thing. Occudorks are mainly white and they're not even embarrassed to be asking us to take care of them. It's a takers/givers thing.

Nothing to get angry about but it is something that has to change.

Manhole Covers Done Right



Most of us think of manhole covers as just another thing in our way when we get the urge to explore the underground, and map out new rat-hunting routes. What? You don't? Well, really, I've never explored the sewers either. But hey, there were manhole covers in the way.

The Japanese have elevated the manhole cover beyond a utilitarian continuation of the sidewalk though. Check them out. Many cool covers here.


Look at it this way; you're already doing a good bit of work forging the steel. Why not add 10% more effort and create something awesome? I'd like to see something like this here. Maybe art deco, or geometrics. We could even do "O"s for Obama. And he'd be all well shucks, what an honor, but he wouldn't know that secretly we made all the "O"s upside-down.

Oh speaking of Obama; this is a random LiveJournal image. Of all the people in this picture, which one would you say is disappointed because he's not the center of attention?:



manhole hat-tip: uniquedaily

Monday, January 30, 2012

Michelle - The Nation's Food-Scold



Michelle notice-how-she's-got-the-outline-of-a-thinner-woman-on-her-dress Obama is seen here launching her Finish Your Vegetables or There Will Be No-TV campaign.

Thank goodness. When our personal flaws prevent us from doing what is right, the Obamas are there to steer us back onto the straight and narrow. We'd probably be off in some alley seasoning our food with salt and not owning a car company were it not for our glorious betters.

(just a thought: has anyone ever seen Michelle eating an apple?)

Friday, January 27, 2012

TED Talks Sense




I found this video via One More Middle Aged Guy. He also had a link to an American Enterprise Inst. discussion of it.

Celebration of Western success isn't common at TED Talks. Maybe it helps that Niall Ferguson is British - his message seemed well received. Now if we could just trick Obama into watching this.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

The Halo is Back



This is an image from daylife (credit: JEWEL SAMAD/AFP/Getty Images) and it looks like it's halo time again. This one is odd too -- I'm going to say the image was manipulated and I don't think you can talk me out of it. (the only way this can possibly happen with the photons I'm used to is by focusing a spotlight directly on the back of his head)

So someone thinks the halo will play again this time around. Either team Obama's lighting director or Jewel Samad. Or both.

Obama is talking up green energy out west. And he's doing it in his perky yes-we-can mode. Which gives me a chance to report on the Green I see at one of the unnamed government facilities I work at.

The little "electric vehicle" I wrote about two and a half years ago has been moved somewhere. (or sold as surplus) As far as I could tell, it wasn't used at all for two years. Annnnnnd.... Another one took it's place. This one looks more like a car, and cost $20,000.00. It's a much more serious vehicle, except that it's top speed is 25 mph. Yeah, it's just another perky golf cart.

Don't be surprised if two years from now I'm posting about how this thing has been taking up space and gathering dust. Unneeded green. Let's just hope that by then we've got a new president.

Reruns




This is everywhere; now it's here too.

In other video news, I taped Princess of Mars last night. It only had one and a half Tivo stars, but hey, it was about Mars. And a princess. How bad could it be?

Well, it could be pretty bad. In fact, when that horrible Humane Society commercial came on it was kind of a relief. I'm like, "Finally, something with a plot."

Which is why I'm recommending you watch it if you ever get the chance. Then, equipped with a new definition of bad, you'll know what I mean if I say that Obama's presidency is worse than Princess of Mars. Except that, unlike the movie, a presidency can't ever get so bad it's good.

From an IMDb review, one disappointed movie goer wrote: "whoever is responsible for allowing this film should be taken by Edgar Rice Burroughs surviving family, taken outside and summarily executed..."

Got that? Not just the movie makers, but anyone who allowed this film to be made should pay the ultimate price. That's brutal, but understandable.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

The Right Tool for the Job


President Obama inspects a giant screw he commissioned
be built "for my inevitable second term." He refused to
explain
its purpose, but he calls it "the taxpayer surprise".


photo via

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

We'll Just Ignore Them and Maybe They'll Go Away


When a commissar fell from favor, Stalin would erase him not just from life but from history.


The tactic seemed to work well for Stalin so the New York Times is imitating the old dictator. Their "I don't know what you're talking about" approach to the March for Life is in it's fifth year.



Too bad for the NYT... alternative sources of news now exist. And refusing to cover events because you disagree with their purpose doesn't make them disappear; it just makes you look petty. From last years March:



Yup. It happened. Couldn't find lumberkid in the video but she was there somewhere. (and I couldn't be more proud)

Mac Daddy




Blingin my eyes to the point of ouchie.

xkcd




xkcd

Monday, January 23, 2012

Mike Check


I'm here.


I heard a handful of occudorks tried to Mic-check a prolife meeting last night. It's good to see that they're finally distilling their message down to the essentials (bridges and abortions, apparently), but has there ever been a protest tactic as lame as the mic-check? I mean, it was lame to start with but now it just seems to be something you yell before you start semi to dis-organized chanting. You might just as well yell, "Chicken and biscuits!!"

Occupy Life



The lumberkid is out at the March for Life again this year, despite a projected high of only 46F.

This is the 39th annual March for Life, and the lumberkid has been going since grade school. She'll join tens of thousands of others and marches will be happening all across the US. Still, the first page of Google News didn't have any March for Life mentions. Ah well.

Poor kid must be freezing in this drizzle. It's hard work being my hero.

You can catch C-Span live video here.

***oh, also:
Google may not have noticed them but the president has.

“And as we remember this historic anniversary [Roe v. Wade], we must also continue our efforts to ensure that our daughters have the same rights, freedoms, and opportunities as our sons to fulfill their dreams.”
-Barack Obama


I'm pretty sure he's speaking about the sons and daughters who aren't aborted. You know, the lucky ones. Because the aborted ones have fewer rights, freedoms, and opportunities. Lots fewer.

What a prez. I remind you:



Sunday, January 22, 2012

Zebra Dance




Real zebras don't dance like this; mainly they line dance.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

I Was Afraid of This



Now that he's found his element there will be no stopping him.

The Pipeline




Here's all you need to know about the pipeline. It's been studied since 2008. The State Dept. has issued their final report. (which couldn't have been more pro-pipeline) And the president won't do it until after the election (which may be too late) in order to appease his last six environmental supporters.


Oh, also, here's a picture of Spike Lee.


image via

Train Cats to do This!




New VW commercial.

h/t: lumberbrudi

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

SOPA srsly




Seriously, about SOPA, it's just too much power put into the hands of people I don't trust. The web would quickly become entangled and impossible to navigate. I have no idea where the above picture originated, but if the original creator wanted, he could shut me down. And I'd have to get in line to be turned back on. The way it works now: some guy emails that he doesn't want me using his image and I delete the post.

Or this:



Remember "My Work Here is Done"? I created the image. I put my "LJ" in the bottom right corner and set it free. Shortly thereafter it started traveling. Now it's all over the place and in some places it's lost the "LJ".

All I ask of anyone who uses my images is that they give me credit and/or a link. But it doesn't bother me when they don't.

But here's the thing; there's nothing to stop some wild eyed utopian from saying that the image is his. Sure, I could prove it was mine if it came down to it but it would require a lot of work. And with SOPA, Blogger would have to shut me down until the dispute was resolved.

A few years back, liberal kids were going around flagging every conservative blog they came across as a spam site. Lumberjacks got caught up in it and Blogger shut me down. It took weeks to get reinstated. Blogger has cleaned up their procedure for eliminating spam sites since then, but SOPA would bring back the bad old days with a vengeance. Anyone could shut anyone down.

So, SOPA bad.

These Guys Are Funny






As a SOPA protest, I will now mwmwmwmwmwmwmwwmwmwmwmwmwm.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

I'm Not Always Subtle



Subtle would have been to change the text to something Obama would say, like "From each/to each" or "We have nothing to fear but stupid republicans and bears." but introduce spelling or grammatical errors.

Maybe, "I am right up there with Lincon and Roosevelt"

or



Notice Anything Funny?



I suppose someone with Photoshop could make the wall say anything.

But funny part: Notice how the right-hander is painting right to left and the left-hander is painting left to right? It's much easier to paint in the direction that allows you to steady your hand with a little finger or wrist that isn't resting in wet paint.

I wonder if this was a case of "OK Mr president just paint your little dab of blue and we'll finish it."

Bonus: the children didn't get the memo about the first lady's center of gravity:



photo via

Monday, January 16, 2012

Andrew Sullivan Hates Being Ignored



Sullivan wrote it. Noel reported it. I fixed it.

The original was, "Why are Obama's Critics so Dumb?" - subtext: why, I'm pretty smart.

***note: Sullivan says he didn't write the headline. Also, he says he criticizes liberals in the article as well... Well, I wrote the above headline and I only criticize liberals concerning it.

And fixed further:


I'm hoping Andrew doesn't have a hissy-tweet over this because the article (which I can only assume Newsweek is still mulling over) criticizes many other Andrews, and even a few Clydes.

Anyway, I might not even agree with the headline. I suppose Sullivan might not agree with his headline either. He hasn't said.

Twinkies in the Balance




AP reports on the Twinkies tragedy:

In Hostess' Chapter 11 filing on Wednesday, the company said its rivals have combined and expanded their reach, heightening competition in the snack space. Hostess' competitors range from Bimbo Bakeries, which makes Entenmann's baked goods, and McKee Foods, which make Little Debbie snack cakes. It also faces competition from larger food makers like Sara Lee and Kraft Inc.

Additionally, Hostess employees are unionized while most of its competitors aren't. As a result, Hostess has high pension and medical benefit costs. The company has 19,000 employees and operates in 48 states.

Most headlines on the bankruptcy make it sound like the Twinkies demise is a done deal. Of course, chapter 11 doesn't automatically mean a company is going out of business. Contracts can be renegotiated, costs can be cut. The union can recognize that its fate is tied to the fate of the company.

But watch: if the company is portrayed as a bunch of fat cats trying to screw the working man, union zealots will negotiate all 19,000 workers out of a job. The company will liquidate and all they'll get out of it is a sense of being wronged by the Man.

If I hear Woody Guthrie playing on the Hostess loading docks, I'm hoarding Twinkies.


Sloth Wash



Or was it slosh wauth? Stosh losh?

Whatever, the lady says they're "not going to be happy when they find out what we're doing," My question is: how can you tell?

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Cat Hatsterson




See? When they aren't drinking heavily, cats can be as cute as dogs.

via boing boing

Friday, January 13, 2012

About that Wizzle Incident


Say "thank you", I won't include a picture.

A few thoughts on the regrettable urination in Afghanistan:

If George Bush were president this would be on every front page and would dominate the news from now until the election.

Desecration is disgusting, but it is nothing when compared to the loss of life. Those guys presumably needed killing. They didn't need desecration, but they've lost every sunrise, every meal, every laugh and every pleasure that would have come to them. Desecration is insignificant compared to that.

Islamic extremists don't much care about desecration, or the Geneva convention, when the shoe is on the other foot.

While I think it's wrong, I can understand what motivated it.

I'm having trouble getting worked up over it. Send out a "don't do that" memo and move on.

They're Immanentizing the Eschaton Again


A tax you pay at the pump:

WASHINGTON — When the companies that supply motor fuel close the books on 2011, they will pay about $6.8 million in penalties to the Treasury because they failed to mix a special type of biofuel into their gasoline and diesel as required by law.

But there was none to be had. Outside a handful of laboratories and workshops, the ingredient, cellulosic biofuel, does not exist.

In 2012, the oil companies expect to pay even higher penalties for failing to blend in the fuel, which is made from wood chips or the inedible parts of plants like corncobs. Refiners were required to blend 6.6 million gallons into gasoline and diesel in 2011 and face a quota of 8.65 million gallons this year.

“It belies logic,” Charles T. Drevna, the president of the National Petrochemicals and Refiners Association, said of the 2011 quota. And raising the quota for 2012 when there is no production makes even less sense, he said.

Penalizing the fuel suppliers demonstrates what happens when the federal government really, really wants something that technology is not ready to provide.

This is like the incandescent light bulb insanity. Your betters decide your lights use too much electricity so they make them illegal. Never mind that there is no acceptable substitute. First they come for the 100 watts, and you don't speak out because you don't use 100 watts. Then they come for the 75's.... And if they had gotten their way, we'd all be awash in mercury from broken soft-serve ice cream bulbs. The fact that every single voter hates those bulbs is the only thing that (hopefully) saved us.

The government wants ethanol, so they crowbar corn into our gas tanks and off of our tables. Meaning we have to pay more for corn and meat. So the government mandates ethanol made from waste cellulose, which doesn't exist. And raises our gas prices because it doesn't.

And this is the balance they've struck. We pay more for gas. We pay more for food. The government gets income in the form of fines which the EPA can use in its quest to fix our lives even further.

I know, by the way, that $6.8 million is a drop in the bucket (har) to the big thinkers in Washington. Look at Solyandra, it's costing us a hundred times that. Look at all the EPA does in its relentless drive to make us sparkle and smell like butterflies. Even if you take out Obama's fraud and kickbacks, they shovel our money into open sewers on an industrial scale.

Here's the thing. The economy isn't great. We shouldn't be "investing" in things we don't want. Not in gasoline made from unobtanium, not in unwanted high speed rail, not in light bulbs that don't light, not in more government agencies to regulate us down to our underpants. We won't improve doctors by making them government employees, or schools by adding second breakfasts.

Couldn't we try not being stupid?

In fact, I think we'd be miles ahead if we could just shut down this government for a while. Give the Chicago swindler a pat on the back and say, "You know, I think you've fixed everything. Why don't you just sit out this last year and try to fathom your own goodness."

Stranded


Sad news. The LSU football team is still stuck in New Orleans.

Someone painted a 50 yard line in front of their bus.


h/t: lumberbrudi

Guy on the Job Asked Me to Name One Thing That's Gotten Better Under Obama






Thursday, January 12, 2012

Kim Jong Un



Post say:

TOKYO — Kim Jong Eun, according to propaganda described in a recent Chinese magazine article, learned to drive at age 3. By 8, he could safely maneuver dirt roads at 75 mph. As a teenager, he mastered four foreign languages. He is now learning three more.

How many years before some North Korean wonders out loud how it is that a 3 year-old could reach the pedals and see over the dash. Second question: where will he be buried?

We've All Done This





Women Love Us Older Men


They think we don't notice, but we do. They admire us
because we know how to fix light switches and unclog sinks.


Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Fast?




Fast? for Justice? and this is day 7? Sounds pretty slow to me.

Just a chance to point out that Obama should have said: "I promise to shut down Guantanamo or at least learn why we must keep it open. And I promise to get right out of Iraq, or at least educate myself as to why it's important to keep to Bush's original status of forces agreement."

image via

Let's Hear His Story


Saw this on Drudge - the story about how the D's are paying this fired factory worker, Randy Johnson, to dog Mitt Romney:

The 57-year-old described how he worked at a factory making office supplies owned by Smith Corona, which facing bankruptcy, sold his plant to another company, Ampad, that has recently been acquired by Bain Capital. Ampad promptly fired all of the workers at the plant, and then re-hired most of them. Since they were a union shop, and over half of the employees had been re-hired, the new owners were forced to recognize the union. They tried to renegotiate the contract, but the union eventually decided to go on strike, so Ampad shuttered the once-profitable factory.

I think it's cool that the D's are picking up his bills, but I think Mitt needs to ask him up on stage next time out. (not to make light of his situation, but to teach him, and the D's supporting him, the basics of capitalism)

The article states that Smith Corona was facing bankruptcy when it sold his factory. In other words, he was already out of a job. He was in the buggy whip industry: a company making typewriters in a computer/word-processing world. Ampad then apparently tried to make it work. Maybe it could have worked with the plant transitioning to products that were more in demand. Maybe it could have worked with the union making concessions. Fact is, it didn't; it went on strike. So Mr Johnson remained out of a job.

The company isn't named but I'll bet it wasn't profitable when it was sold to Ampad. The article calls it a "once-profitable factory" but that's not the point. In the real world, what matters is the probability of it being profitable in the future.

I think it's a darned shame when it doesn't work, but Randy Johnson needed both Ampad and his union's cooperation in order to revive his job. Not knowing the facts it's impossible to say who was more to blame, but automatically blaming Ampad is stupid.

Romney didn't axe Randy Johnson's job. Ampad didn't destroy his livelihood. The laser printer did. It's unfortunate but there it is.

In a free market, the typewriter makers and buggy whip shops give way to printer makers and auto workers. The answer isn't to prop up the obsolete technology. Randy Johnson needs to move on, even if it's not easy. Lamenting the past doesn't build a thing.

Monday, January 09, 2012

Important Message



This seems like one I may have already posted. If so; well, here it is again.

via

Cute Happens


Into each life some cute must fall
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow















Our Old Friend



Well color me tickled. I see that Vermin Supreme showed up for the New Hampshire dog and pony show. Vermin, or Virm as I imagine his friends might call him, is the only openly fascist candidate for president. He seems to be for mandatory tooth-brushing, and old fashioned imperialism. So what's not to like?

But, more importantly, he's the only presidential candidate to ever comment at Are We Lumberjacks. And I'm prepared to overlook a little fascism if there's even an outside possibility of a cabinet appointment.


Say what you will, fascism bad, yadda, yadda, but it's hard to think poorly of a man who looks this good in a boot. If Old Spice had a lick of sense, those "your man" commercials would have exploited our natural inclination to trust anyone with a boot on their head.



Welcome back to the national stage Mr Vermin Supreme. You probably smell marvelous.

fighting101s.jpg